Dream A Little Dream...

Yesterday...

2009-05-07T23:19:00.001+08:00

Yesterday - Leona Lewis

I just cant believe your gone,
still waiting for morning to come,
when i see if the sun will rise,
in the way that your by my side,
oooo where we had so much in store,
tell me what is it all reaching for,
when were through building memories
I’ll hold yesterday in my heart,
in my heart
they can take tomorrow and the plans we made,
they can take the music that we’ll never play,
all the broken dreams,
take everything,
just take it away,
but they can never have yesterday,
they can take the future that we’ll never know
they can take the places that we said we will go,
all the broken dreams take everything,
just take it away,
but they can never have yesterday
you always choose to stay,
i should be thankful for everyday,
heaven knows what the future holds,
or least where the story goes,
i never believed until now,
i know I’ll see you again I’m sure,
no its not selfish to ask for more,
one more night one more day
one more smile on your face
but they cant take yesterday,
they can take tomorrow and the plans we made,
they take the music that we’ll never play,
all the broken dreams take everything,
just take it away,
but they can never have yesterday,
they can take the future that we’ll never know,
they can take the places that we said we will go,
all the broken dreams, take everything, just take it away,
but they can never have yesterday.
I thought our days would last forever,
but it wasn’t our destiny,
coz in my mind we had so much time,
but I was so wrong,
no I can believe me i can still find the strength
in the moments we made
I’m looking back on yesterday
they can take tomorrow and the plans we made,
they take the music that we’ll never play,
all the broken dreams take everything,
just take it away,
but they can never have yesterday,
they can take the future that we’ll never know,
they can take the places that we said we will go,
all the broken dreams,
take everything,
just take it away,
but they can never have yesterday.

Mixed Feelings....

2009-05-05T19:40:00.003+08:00

sitting here staring blankly at the screen...

wanted to vent out my feelings...but i just don't know what exactly i'm feeling right now...

i'm so tired...

all i want is for all that have happened to END today...

i'm hoping for a better tomorrow...

i just can't go through this for one more day...

all i want is a simple and happy life...

i don't want to go through all this again..never...

enough of broken heart...

it's time to pick up the broken pieces...and start anew...

i don't know if "you" will be reading this...but all i want you to know is i'm hoping for a new start...a new beginning for both of us...

let just end this chapter and start a new chapter in our life...

Fear

2009-05-03T07:32:00.003+08:00

can't sleep... :(

kept thinking bout him...

i want to see him so badly...

i don't know why i'm having this FEAR feeling in me...

it's killing me that i'm not able to see him...not able to call him...not able to message him...

Pressure...

2009-05-02T12:10:00.004+08:00

i'm beginning to feel the pressure he's getting..

pressure from the parents..

the parents might not now exactly what is going on..whatever it is i just hope that they will at least give him some time and freedom at the moment..to let him settle things that he need to settle..

i have faith in him..and i believe that after all this..things will definitely get better

If only the parents understand this..things will be less complicated..

My Long and "Not So Lonely" Weekend....

2009-05-01T22:12:00.005+08:00

i was actually dreading for this long weekend...but so far it was not that bad...

met up with Jane and Nicole last night for dinner..had a great time catching up with them...

and I had a great time today catching up with Janice...

went to midvalley for lunch...spent some time shopping...

got a zippo lighter for him..engraved his name on it...not that i'm encouraging him to smoke more..but i thought of getting him something that he will use everyday and that can remind him of me..

i'm gonna catch up with the other Janise tomorrow...gonna have lunch together and shopping again! we are gonna scout around hartamas and bangsar to shop! probably will have dinner at KLCC with mom after that...

sunday's plan is to catch up with wendy...

it's great to have some girly time with my girlfriends...but yet i'm not feeling that happy...

i guess it's because that's not how i want to spend my long weekend...

i wish i can spend this long weekend with him...

i miss him...so badly...

Soul Mate...

2009-04-30T10:16:00.001+08:00

Soul mates are people who bring out the best in you...

They are not perfect but are always perfect for you...

3rd Party...

2009-04-29T00:45:00.001+08:00

why do i feel like i'm the 3rd party...

why?? why do i have such a feeling??

don't like this feeling at all...

Waiting Patiently...

2009-04-26T20:26:00.001+08:00

i'm waiting...waiting patiently...

i hope it's worth waiting...

there's nothing more torturing than counting the days...

Love Paradise-Kelly Chen

2009-04-25T23:49:00.001+08:00

You're always on my mind
All day just all the time
You're everything to me
Brightest star to let me see
You touch me in my dreams
We kiss in every scene
I pray to be with you
through rain and shiny days
I'll love you Till I die
Deep as sea Wide as sky
The beauty of our love paints rainbows
Everywhere we go
Need you all my life
You're my hope You're my pride
In your arms I find my heaven
In your eyes my sea and sky
May life be our love paradise

You're always on my mind
All day just all the time
You're everything to me
Brightest star to let me see
You touch me in my dreams
We kiss in every scene
I pray to be with you
through rain and shiny days
I'll love you Till I die
Deep as sea Wide as sky
The beauty of our love paints rainbows
Everywhere we go
Need you all my life
You're my hope You're my pride
In your arms I find my heaven
In your eyes my sea and sky
May life be our love paradise

I'll love you Till I die
Deep as sea Wide as sky
The beauty of our love paints rainbows
Everywhere we go
Need you all my life
You're my hope You're my pride
In your arms I find my heaven
In your eyes my sea and sky
May life be our love paradise

Calm..

2009-04-25T23:25:00.002+08:00

after so many days of being so negative...i'm feeling a bit calm and at peace today...

went up to genting with wendy...had coffee at starbucks and chatted for couple of hours...

weather was great...cooling and breezy...and i was feeling so at peace...

it's 11.30pm now...and i have not got a single msg or call from him...but i'm not feeling down like before...i know i won't be getting calls or msges from him for this few days...past couple of days i will feel down and sad...but not now...

i just felt so calm right now...

I Miss You..

2009-04-24T00:42:00.002+08:00

there's nothing better then to go to sleep with the person you love in your arms..

i miss the "arms" that cuddle me to sleep..

i miss you..

so badly..

M.I.S.E.R.A.B.L.E

2009-04-23T18:52:00.001+08:00

i'm feeling SO MISERABLE right now...

i don't know how to describe the feelings..

i've never felt so miserable in my life before...

How Long Can I Endure...

2009-04-23T14:57:00.002+08:00

i'm beginning to feel very tired..

so tired..i wanna cry myself out..

i feel like i'm having split personalities..

at work..i have to be cheerful..i joke..i laugh..i smile..but that's not how i'm feeling right now..

at home..i have to act like as if nothing happened so that mom will not get worry..that's why i don't feel like going home early after work..

all i want now is a corner for myself..with no one around..let me cry my heart out..

Numb...

2009-04-23T13:00:00.002+08:00

don't know why..woke up this morning with this NUMB feeling in me...

i'm feeling so numb rite now..if someone's going to stab me right now..i know for sure i won't feel any pain..

i had the worst leg cramp last nite..this morning limping all the way to work..

worst still..just awhile ago..my nose was bleeding..

i need a BREAK..i need a REST..real bad..

I Cares...

2009-04-22T18:02:00.002+08:00

“Inside the heart of each and every one of us there is a longing to be understood by someone who really cares. When a person is understood, he or she can put up with almost anything in the world.”

I know you are reading my blog now ;) all i want you to know is..believe in yrself.. Please don't nag yourself with thoughts of failure..simply do what you can do..in the best way you know..

Your parents just want the best for you..that's why sometimes they react like that..just spend a lil time with them and they will be very happy..prove to yr dad that you are not a failure..which you ARE NOT..whatever it is..nothing is more important than family..

You Are The Reason...

2009-04-22T14:56:00.000+08:00

You Are The Reason - Air Supply

Here's on the street
a tear in the seam
of pleasure and pain
Life carries on
a cloak of deceit
brings honour to shame
But the voice I used to know
(Where are you now?)
is the one I can't let go

Chorus:
You are the reason
my faith in tomorrow
A Distant horizon
the one I must follow
You are the first, You are the last

I'help you to see
the light in the dark
the sun through the rain
until you are free
and facing the truth
that words can't explain
But the truth I think you know(Tell me)
I could never let you go

Chorus

you are the future from the past
You are the spell that has been cast

You are the reason
my faith in tomorrow
A distant horizon
the one I must follow

Chorus

You are the first
You are the last to me
oom hm.....You are to me...You are

Feeling Suffocated...

2009-04-22T14:49:00.002+08:00

i'm feeling so suffocated now...

it's like someone is taking a screwdriver and tighten up the screws in my heart...so tight...so uncomfortable..so painful..

someone help me to loosen the screws pls..

i feel so sick..

the feeling of missing him real bad..wanting to see..to touch..to hold..to hug..to kiss him is soooooo unbearable..

Mind and Emotion on Roller Coaster Ride...

2009-04-22T12:33:00.001+08:00

can someone please tell me where and how to push the stop button for this ride...

i'm feeling very sick from this ride...

very very sick...

I Miss You so badly....

3rd Day Without Him...

2009-04-22T09:34:00.002+08:00

3rd day without him...

life seems to be meaningless..

don't look forward to the end of the day...

used to anticipate going home early to see him and spend time with him...

dreading for the weekends that's coming...

You Are The Reason...

2009-04-21T23:43:00.002+08:00

You are the reason i sleep soundly at night...
I miss the warm hand that cuddle me to sleep at night...
I miss our goodnight kiss...
I miss you...........

Smile?

2009-04-21T22:34:00.002+08:00

colleague asked me today..why i am not as cheerful as i was one week ago...

i don't know how to answer them...really...i cannot be giving them excuse like "i'm stress with work" cos i don't have much to do yet...

i tried...i tried to smile..i tried to be cheerful..but it's very tiring...

i really wish i can just go to sleep and not wake up at all...

Exhausted...

2009-04-21T22:29:00.001+08:00

i'm feeling soooo exhausted...

mentally..physically..

i just wish i can dig a hole and bury myself in it...

I Believe in You...

2009-04-21T18:42:00.001+08:00

I believe in you..i really do..no one has ever gave me the kind of feeling that you gave me...

The feeling is so strong that i'm not able to describe it...

Love Endures All...

2009-04-21T18:38:00.000+08:00

When you absolutely feel that there is no chance of every making it work, but you still dream about the person day and night, and you would do anything to hold them.....

Faith..Hope..Believes

2009-04-21T18:30:00.002+08:00

ppl said..every cloud will have it's silver lining..when will my silver lining will appear..all i can see now is black clouds...

i'm holding on to all the faith and hope i have in me..every single one of it...

i need strength..lots of it...to fight this...